It sounded good at the time, anyway. This summer I decided to shift away from running as my main aerobic exercise since I felt like I was always complaining about how many miles I wasn’t able to do. My right knee has that distinctive Rice Krispies sound that tells me I may have to schedule a doctor’s visit in a few years and I probably won’t like what I hear when I do it. So, in classic avoidance technique I decided I should shift to boxing. Me smart.
Me hurt now.
After a month of anticipation, phone calls, and research (I watched Rocky and browsed fashionable boxing accessories), I had my first boxing class today.
Apparently boxing is like church: no one arrives until after everything begins. But I was there, and after the instructor helped me wrap my hands, he tossed me a pair of gloves, put me front and center and we were off and running. People drifted in while he put us through a basic full-body callisthenic routine, and once we began punching combinations on the heavy bags the serious sweat began to flow.
The words “speed rounds” may give me nightmares tonight. I kept my feet moving (boxing is more like running than I knew) and my hands up (mostly). Who knew two 14 oz. gloves could weigh as much as anvils? Or — and let me say this is the worst part of boxing so far, worse even than the pain I feel right now before the aspirin kicks in — stink so horribly?? Next order of business: get my own gloves. Which I’m sure will always emit the fragrance of fresh and dewy roses.
Speaking of roses, I was the only woman in my class today. And it could be that I wasn’t dressed appropriately, but I won’t know that until I see what other women wear. The standard outfit I saw on the guys consisted of ginormous baggy shorts, skull motif tee shirts, and ragged sneakers. Scruffy is presumably the way to go, and my trim aerobics shorts and cheery sport tank were decidedly out of place. Also, today I noticed that I’m really tall. Everyone else is crouched down, hunched into their punching bags. I move less like Muhommad Ali and more like Gumby. Maybe later I’ll get the gist of that “float like a butterfly” thing.
Overall, I kept up. I was in better aerobic shape than most of the guys there, although I’m sure my punches are about as hard as room temperature butter, and I just laughed and laid on the floor when the instructor called for (and snapped off) fifty push-ups during the “cool down.” Riiiight.
My shoulders, upper back, and neck are all crying for a three-day vacation in Maui with complimentary Mai Tai’s now, but I’m mentally psyched, and I find myself saying “Yo, Adrian!” when I see someone in the hall. I’ll let you know how it goes.