runner Lisa vs. bad Lisa

Runner Lisa: This will be good. I haven’t run on a treadmill in a while.
Bad Lisa: My feet are killing me. Those new shoes were wretched all day at work.
RL: I have on my Thorlos, my all-time best comfiest socks.
BL: Ugh, Dr. Phil is lecturing yet another hapless teenage couple.
RL: True, it would be easier to run without being forced to look at four channels on 16 screens.
BL: Maybe just a short run today.
RL: Although my aerobic capacity is good, from all that swimming I’ve been doing.
BL: Horrors! There are plenty of treadmills free, why do the college co-eds have to run next to me??
RL: Oh, man. She is totally on our pace.
BL: This soooo sucks. Let’s do weights.
RL: No, you know what happens now.
BL: No way, my feet are killing me.
RL: Way. We don’t quit until she does.
BL: She’s 20!
RL: We’re experienced.
BL: My day is ruined.
RL: We may be here a while.

(two and a half miles later)

RL: I think we’re holding up okay.
BL: This has GOT to end, I’m dying here.
RL: I refuse to give in. I’m still breathing just fine!
BL: Everything hurts.

(just under the three mile point)

RL: Look at that! I smell victory! She’s holding onto the rails so that she doesn’t actually have to haul her butt along! Fudger.
BL: Cheater!
RL: Slacker!
BL & RL: Looooser! (exchanging a mental hi-five)
RL: There she goes. Ha. We have proven our superiority. We win. We were right to pass on our genes.
BL: Thank God it’s over. Let’s quit.
RL: Wait, wait! She’s coming back for her towel; keep running like we have a couple more miles to put in.
BL: You gotta be kidding me.
RL: There she goes. Give her two minutes to leave the gym and we’re good.
BL: We are so gonna pay for this tomorrow.
RL: We are gonna do the victory dance all day tomorrow.
BL: Let’s get hot wings on the way home.

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