Runner Lisa vs. Bad Lisa

Runner Lisa: It’s a gorgeous morning for a run!
Bad Lisa: We haven’t run for over a week. This is gonna hurt.
RL: We’ll get back in the swing.
BL: I need to pee.
RL: You just went!
BL: It’s freezing.
RL: That’s what this nice jacket is for.
BL: What if a neighbor sees us? We will be ashamed of how ridiculously slow we look.
RL: If a neighbor sees us THEY will be ashamed that we’re out here running and they aren’t.

RL: Okay, we’ll start with walking up the hill. At the top, we’ll move into a nice slow jog.
BL: That first downhill is terrible on the knees.
RL: So we’ll shorten stride.
BL: I might need a tissue.
RL: You’re sounding pretty weak.
BL: I feel pretty puny.
RL: Maybe you should shut up and run.

BL: OMG, the Husband is coming up behind us. He’s gonna PASS us. Or dog our heels. This is terrible.
RL: Hm, let’s see if we can do some intervals, move further ahead, then we can turn off the straightaway and get on a different route.
BL: I may perish in the attempt.
RL: I’ll come back for you later.

BL: It’s not working. I can hear him schlepping along behind us again. Listen to that! Why does he scrape his feet like that? It can’t be aerodynamic.
RL: He appears to have a higher pace than we can do, even with the schlepping.
BL: We’re silent but slow.
RL: At least we’re moving.
BL: THAT man is moving. He’s on like a 9 minute mile pace. We’re on, like, a 30 minute mile pace.
RL: Sometimes it feels that way.

RL: Look at us! We’re past thirty minutes. We met our goal. Next run will be better.
BL: What’s my reward? A donut?
RL: Nice try. How about a walk around the block?
BL: More exercise is not considered a reward.
RL: Yes, I’d love to have you join me on a walk. It will be a pleasure.

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