The Glowing Edge

Tag: vampires

  • Twilight Didn’t Do It For Me

    Twilight Didn’t Do It For Me

    When I was in school the only book we ever passed around was Judy Blume’s Wifey, which had sex scenes. We shared the novel furtively, like we were slipping over a nickel bag of pot; no one knew who owned it — the same dog-eared copy must have passed through the locker of every female in 8th grade.

    So imagine my surprise when the First brought home a honking doorstopper of a book which — get this — a girl had loaned him. No sex in the entire thing, either. You guessed it, it was Twilight.

    I tried to engage with the Twilight phenomenon, I really did. But it clearly wasn’t written for me so I returned the 4-pound hardback (the First had read it in a flash) and back it went to the girl who convinced him to read it in the first place. (She soon sent home boat anchor number two in the series.)

    Recently my nine-year-old son was loaned a copy of the Twilight movie by a girl on his bus. (What is it with girls today?) I figured the movie would be more accessible, so last night I sat on the couch with all three of my boys and watched the first half.

    Two things:

    1. There’s nothing interesting about these vampires. Yes, Eddie-boy is brooding and beautiful (I actually like the Jacob character more), but that isn’t enough to carry the film. Plus, the girl has one expression, rather like Elijah Wood’s Frodo in the LOTR series. Boy do I ever get tired of that same look.

    2. There’s nothing interesting about these special effects. Let me tell you who rocks the effects: Chow Yun Fat films and their like. You know, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Curse of the Golden Flower, Hero, House of Flying Daggers and all the others. Dude, ninja-types get me totally jacked up, how they can balance on a perfect autumn leaf in mid-air while their robes billow about them and their sword gleams. Epic. These vampires have a little bit of super speed, but CYF and his crew would kick their vampire butts in any show-down, any day, no question.

    So. I’ll finish watching it with the boys tonight, but I ain’t expecting much. Feel free to weigh in and convince me otherwise. Did you like it? Why or why not?

  • gothic wonder

    I started reading Mary Modern yesterday afternoon, and read the last shudderingly delicious pages just before midnight. Lyric, gothic, and yet very new millennium, this book brings to mind Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein and the host of “what if” reprogenetics fiction offerings that followed.

    The central character, unloved geneticist Lucy Morrigan, successfully clones her grandmother Mary, who is “born” at the age of twenty-two with all the residual memories — but none of the actual experience — of her original. Lucy’s strangled fury at the spinning-out-of-control course of her life, combined with Mary’s blatant misery and the frantic interplay of the half-dozen secondary characters create a bizarre and fascinating brew.

    My favorite writing technique was the DNA sequences between the chapters, which were interleaved with poetic random memory transcriptions. I would have loved more of this integrated into the chapters themselves, such that they did not all read quite so cleanly, but more like the increasingly disjointed lives of the characters. I also fervently wish DeAngelis had resisted the urge to throw in the (obligatory?) rabid preacher who hopes to clone Jesus. Please, does everyone have to do this?

    But what a debut! DeAngelis has shown herself competent to stand among greats; her style is reminiscent of Margaret Atwood and Flannery O’Connor, both of whom excelled at revealing the most engrossing and repellent aspects of their characters in a manner which compels the reader to continue following down the twisted roads they travel. She also immediately brought to mind Katherine Dunn’s 1983 novel Geek Love, in which Dunn’s circus-freak character Arty establishes a religious cult which promises redemption through the self-amputation of fingers and other body parts.

    Human desire, Irish mythology, gothic romance, dreams of Antarctica, cults and cult followers, multi-generational family dysfunction, and a stainless-steel “simwomb.” What more could one ask for, on a foggy moonlit night?

  • 13 Things Dracula Would Never Be Caught (Dead) Doing

    1. using his inhaler
    2. stain-treating his laundry
    3. printing off comics with silly putty
    4. surfing lolcats
    5. taking part in a balloon-popping relay race
    6. knitting (or scrapbooking)
    7. auditioning for Cats
    8. planning a trip to Gatlinburg
    9. downloading Legally Blonde to his video iPod
    10. doing the child pose
    11. making hot cocoa with little marshmallows
    12. playing with the pep band
    13. driving a minivan

    Thanks to the Ice for the inspiration, and to all three boys for contributing material…

  • One of My Earliest Stupid Ideas, and How It Turned Out

    One of My Earliest Stupid Ideas, and How It Turned Out

    Watching “Salem’s Lot” while babysitting at home one night. Yep.

    Here’s the basic timeline of events.

    1975: I was ten years old when the “Salem’s Lot” book came out. I read it, so I should have known better than to watch the movie. Alone. At night.

    1979: The made for TV movie came out. I was 14 and stupid. I watched it, and became reasonably certain that vampires existed and were after me. I began going to bed clutching a cheap silver cross necklace that I got at the State Fair three years previously. I wasn’t sure this tactic would work, but didn’t have an alternative.

    1986: I discovered Anne Rice’s books “Interview with the Vampire” and “The Vampire Lestat.” I read them, and felt somewhat relieved. Vampires weren’t as scary as I had thought. Some of them are rock stars. Whew.

    Image credit: izarbeltza on Flickr