The 2007 Pre-Teen Boy Gift Trifecta

The gift thing is kind of low-key in our house compared to most people I know. However, the gifts our boys do receive get preferentially ranked by them in ways I would never predict.

3. Digital Entertainment: Pokemon and Pirates
Well, this one I can predict; what surprised me was that it turned up at number three rather than higher. However, movies and GameBoy games are always loved, partly because stuff like that is severely restricted in our house (one hour of “screen time” per boy per day; no computer or movies on school nights). We don’t have XBox or Wii or PlayStation, but the boys have a cast-off GameBoy that someone gave them several years ago, and it gets passed around with great reverence. It also spends long weeks turned off and in The Husband’s custody because of the arguing it inspires. However, Gram sent a new Pokemon Game AND the Pirates of the Caribbean #3, and her name is being breathed with prayers of thanksgiving.

2. Weapons: DIY Nunchucks
We have a “no guns” household, which means our boys are desperate for alternative weapons. Thus, they adore swords, knives, throwing stars, catapults, longbows, and anything else that can sneak past my definition of firearms; I figure if they are going to practice killing, they are going to have to do it the old-fashioned way: by hand and up close. Anyway, I went to the hardware store and bought a handful of inch-thick dowel rods, a packet of eyebolts, a length of swing chain, and three colors of electrician’s tape and put it in a box. On the lid of the box I drew a picture of a pair of nunchucks (handles “padded” with electrician’s tape), and they were beside themselves with joy. Let the maiming begin.

1. Food: Beef Jerky and Snow Cones
I gave them each THEIR OWN PERSONAL package of beef jerky, the ultimate in manly-man food. Goes great with nunchucku. More expensive than nunchucku. I also got them a snow cone machine (goes great with beef jerky and nunchucku, see picture), mostly out of nostalgia for the old Snoopy Sno-Cone maker that I never had. Now maybe they will actually refill the ice cube trays rather than perpetually leaving them out for someone else to do. Now if I could only think of a similar incentive for the toilet seat issue.

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